Only in America

Only in America - can a pizza get to your house faster
than an ambulance.

Only in America - are there handicap parking places in
front of a skating rink.

Only in America - do drugstores make the sick walk all
the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while
healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America - do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America - do banks leave both doors open and
then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America - do we leave cars worth thousands of
dollars in
the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in America - do we use answering machines to screen
calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from
someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in America - do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten
and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America - do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many'
and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures.'

Only in America - do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering and McDonald's drive up windows with Braillemenus

Only in America - the budgets for advertising non-essential
items, like soft drinks, exceed the budgets of many
third-world nations.

Only in America - do people buy domestic brand tires, because
they want to "buy American," and install them on their
imported cars.

Only in America - are the least useful professions (professional
athletes, movie actors & entertainers) paid so disproportionally
much compared to people with normal jobs.


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